Some guys think they are SO great, and the thing is, they're not.

Blogging is weird. You can become really good friends with someone and never even meet them. Sometimes you get to know their personality better than their own 'real life' friends.

A friendship like this can go on for years until that one fateful day when they say, 'So, do you want to meet for dinner?' Then you think, oh shit. I actually don't know this person. Are they going to stab me or what?

Well that's what happened to me tonight. After 'knowing' Nanette for a really long time, I finally met her face to face. And you know what? She totally stabbed me. Bastard.

I was kidding about the stabbing, but the dinner was really cool. I delivered the wedding programs I designed for her, since she will be married next week on a very nice rain free day. One thing we didn't talk about was the Office, which is weird since we both LOVE that show. Will Jim and Pam ever get together??

It felt like we had been, or should have been, friends for years and years. You can go to her blog and get her side of the story. It probably goes something like, "Jenn is scary and now I need a restraining order..."
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They were some kind of asian...

Don't you hate when something you love suddenly becomes uber-cool? Don't you hate when people use the word 'uber?' Yeah. Me too.

Todays the L.A. Times did a huge article on the new 'cool Sawtelle Blvd.'. You know what that means...now parking to go to Giant Robot is going to be even more of a bitch. Great. It also means that Rokes and I have to go somewhere else for lunch when she comes to town.

Also in the paper - today's 'My Favorite Weekend' feature is none other than Mr. Sulu-George Takei. He's going to be on Will & Grace tonight...with Britney Spears. Um, yeah.
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Close your eyes, and think of someone you physically admire, and let me kiss you

I don't wear makeup. I never have. I'm sure I need it, but screw it - I'm always rubbing my eyes, so it'd just turn into a giant mess.

One thing I need, is lipstick. I look awful without it, and feel funny if I'm not wearing it. I need to have many shades, apparently. I don't know. I just like a full color palette. It's the artist in me. As you can see, I rarely stray from a certain brand. Hey, I know what I like. Still, it's nothing compared to my shoe addiction...


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My life ain't no holidayI've been through the point of no return

Man. I woke up feeling like I'd gone on a bender. I can't remember much of yesterday, there was a pile of dishes in the sink and the house was a WRECK. Yes, I'm still married, thanks for asking. My husband just, doesn't do 'stuff'. What can I say.

Feeling 'normal' is totally taken for granted. I forgot how great it is to breathe the air and be able to walk around feeling ok. It feels...good.

I went out at 7am and blew bubbles. Goodbye Stormwatch.


.

Painful to me, pierce right through me

I haven't felt this bad in a really, really long time. Today I had the worst migraine. For those of you who don't get them, or can't imagine what they feel like - f*ck you. There is nothing worse in the world, not even childbirth. There, I said it. The last time I had one, I was working, and pregnant. My boss - ever the sympathizer - told me to 'go to the car for an hour and sleep it off.' Lovely.

Migraines are hereditary. Which is just great. I can remember back to my childhood, and my mother lying in bed for days. Cut to me suffering the same fate, years later. When you get one, there's no stopping them. You have a sensitivity to light, smell, touch, everything. It is also why I don't drink, and don't smoke. They are also stress related, which is why I frequently got them every week in college.

It is also why I always wear sunglasses when I go out. Not to look cool, I don't need sunglasses for that - *wink*, but because just the tiniest bit of sunlight piercing my retina can ruin my day.

After much puking and sleeping, a migraine will eventually go away on it's own. It's just that much harder to take care of when you have two kids.

I put the baby in the playpen, instructed the Kid to "make sure your brother doesn't die." Then I passed out on the ground. I woke up and hour later to the Kid poking my face saying, "mommy wake up!". This is why they are not readying a plaque with my name on it for mother of the year.
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Rain. Wash away my sorrow, take away my pain

I got in a car accident yesterday. At Tito's. Don't eat tacos when you are sad. They don't taste as good.

Note: to all of Los Angeles - seeing as how it is 'Stormwatch' today, and seeing as how I do need to leave the house, please - stay away from me. Thanks.
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It's a shame we have to die my dear, no one's getting out of here, alive. This time.

O.G. will always drop everything to spend time with the kids. I know I am very lucky and while I appreciate it, sometimes, I think she's nuts...

Jenn: "I need your help tomorrow."
O.G.: "I have to go to a funeral, but I can skip it"
Jenn: "Oh geez, that's horrible. Don't worry about it!"
O.G.: "That's ok, it's not important."
Jenn: "God, no. Who was it?"
O.G.: "My best friend's husband."
Jenn: "WHAT! The man is dead, just go!"
O.G.: "If he's dead then he won't care anyway."

Good point.
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Hairdresser on fire

I am not Angelina Jolie. Maybe I could pass for her short, not-so-hot nanny. When I took the Kid to the park this weekend, a woman pointed at him, turned to her husband and whispered, "Look! It's Maddox!"

It's in the hole

Oh dear god. Stupid cable company, you got my money. For a few months anyway. I decided to go forth and add on HBO so I can watch the Sopranos, it being 'the end' and all. Along with that came the god awful Big Love, whose only saving grace is using the Beach Boys "God Only Knows" as it's theme, a song I can't ever get enough of. Still, the show gives me the heebie jeebies, but I may have to watch just to see what happens to these freaks. I don't need to see Bill Paxton's naked ass ever again though, I'll tell you what.

More importantly, I have FINALLY been able to watch Entourage. It's very L.A. and prominently features many of the places I frequent, which I kinda dig. On the website, each episode also gives a rundown of shooting locations which is pretty interesting.

Otherwise, HBO kinda blows. When I'm up at 4am every night, my only two options are porn or golf. I chose the golf, by the way. I spent hours of my early teen years on the driving range. There's something so satisfying about driving a ball off the tee 300 yards, so very crisp and clean-like. Gets rid of aggressions. I miss that.
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Hello did you miss me? I know I'm hard to resist

Every cute boy should own this shirt.
Whether they are 40 or 4 months.
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Dabei war da am HorizontNur 99 Luftballons

THis Sunday, Vh-1 "Pay to Play" is taking donations for video requests to benefit Hurricane Katrina. Some dude - paid $35,000 to have them play Nena "99 Luftballoons" for ONE HOUR STRAIGHT.

Now there's a man that knows what he likes.
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wild boys never close your eyeswild boys always shine

My cousin once said, "If you ever want to know who the new 'hot guy' on the scene is, check O.G.'s kitchen wall. She probably has his picture hanging up there."

This is true. Lest we forget the series premiere of 'Lois & Clark' when she was all about Dean Cain? Johnny Depp - for schizzle. Or in the 80's, pre-24 when it was Kiefer?

It's not all movies though, it's sports too. As witnessed by my own eyes, since I was the chauffeur to no less than two supermarkets where she desperately searched for a Wheaties box with Apolo Anton Ohno's face on it. Since I don't watch the Olympics I have no idea who this is. She assures me he's cute. And obviously worth a $3 box of cereal.

What in the hell she's going to do with this box once she gets it, I have no idea. My guess is she'll be eating Wheaties for weeks and then it'll be up on the kitchen wall.
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Second best is never enough, you’ll do much better baby on your own

Growing up we had two refrigerators. One in the kitchen, and one in the garage. The garage one was stacked to the gills with Coke, for my dad, who drank it like water.

Now that I am older and have my own house, I also have two fridges, much to the dismay of my husband who sees no need. He said "no one ever grew up with two refrigerators." That sounds like that line from Back to the Future, "No one has TWO television sets." Whatever.

So when my brother called the other day, to see if he could have that second fridge, I refused. I want my second fridge. I need it. For...uh, stuff, yeah. I don't know what for, but I need it. He said that it was ok, he'll just go buy a cheap one.

If only my brother only took the time to think about it, he'd realize that the second fridge was actually his, and that he left it with me after he moved out of his last place. Haha. *evil laugh* Second fridge is mine all mine!! If you have anything you want kept cold, bring it on over.
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Run Forest, run

I hate exercising, running is the worst. Most women with boobs would agree. However I did run the very first "Run Hit Wonder" 5K a few years ago, but that's only because 1. My husband forced me to. And 2. the Flock of Seagulls were playing along the route. But in general, forget it. I don't sweat, darling.

But Shiz? Well, she pulled out all the stops and ran the 26 mile L.A. Marathon. I think she passed on the free lap dances that were offered at mile 18, though. Still, I'm in awe. She's truly a rock star.
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Junk on my trunk

Well. At least he admitted it.
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the perfect storm

Last night was 'Stormwatch 2006'...or something.

Around 10pm I heard a giant explosion and all the power went out. After checking around, here's the damage - the VCR exploded, it's dead. The Tivo...bye bye. The dimmer lights, no longer dim. In the baby's room, the surge protector exploded and burned, which I guess is a good thing cause it stopped other things from, well, exploding. However the Kid's tv...well, it's purely decorative now...
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Don't look back in anger

Want to see a picture of my ass?

I passed the mirror today and I was like...what...is on...my butt?

Stupid Kid and his stupid Maisy stickers...
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I hope I'm old before I dieI hope I live to relive the days gone by

This weekend I found myself in a conversation with a girl. Well. "Conversation" depends on how you see it. She went on and started...talking. Nonstop.

"He's younger than me but that doesn't bother me, even though I've always been attracted to older men, I'm 23, you know? And..."

It's horrible but all I could think about was the fact that NOTHING was coming out of her mouth. Not that what she was saying wasn't important to her, but it was just...random shit.

"And I'm glad that he listens to me, cause I need people to listen, you know? And I think we are really good for each other..."

As I stood there listening to her, I just sort of...glazed over. I thought to myself, good lord, is this what I sounded like when I was in my early 20's? I guess I never really thought that there was much of a difference between 20's and 30's, but there is. Also, if you haven't noticed, a blog by an early 20 year old is vastly different from a 30 something year old, as well. Not only the subject matter, but the way they are written. I guess I can relate better and appreciate more.

"Funny you should ask, we met a rave actually..."

I like this girl a lot. She's really nice and fun, but I thought - man, I must seem REAL OLD to her. Especially since, good lord I can't even imagine going to a rave right now, but YES, probably if I was in my 20's, so there you go.

Bringing this post full circle, 'bffjeningeorgia' is coming in to town. Um, I just realized that we graduated from high school 15 years ago. F*ck. I am old.
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Now it begins, cleanup time

Birthday cupcakes. These are the Martha Stewart cupcake recipe. Another on my quest for the perfect cupcake. Sadly, this wasn't it. It was on the right track though. But 3 sticks of butter and 5 eggs? Christ woman, you must be making up for the crap prison food. Thanks for the tip anyway, Joyce.

The frosting is my special COFFEE flavored buttercream. That's right, bitches, I said coffee, and it's every bit as good as your caffeine addled brains can imagine.

The Kid 'helped' me out with the decoration. Uh, let's just say four cupcakes got sprinkles, and the rest? Well...

The fifth of November

V for Vendetta? So amazingly good! I enjoyed it a lot, and no mask nightmares. That Queen Amidala is a good actress.

Since it was a DC movie, they showed the Superman trailer. Really nice on the big screen. Brandon Routh. *cutie* Though I still like Tom Welling best.
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Angela: "I wouldn't mind a pair of two well behaved boys."

I think I am getting a divorce. That is my present to my husband for his birthday this weekend. I asked him what he wanted for a gift and he said, "More kids." Sorry, not happening. Ever. I said EVER. So now he can go get a new wife and have his 10 kids. After all, we're not polygamists*. I'm off the hook. Happy birthday! Sounds like a gift to myself...

Timely as always, tonight's Office was called "Take your daughter to work day." (watch clip) Dwight saying "Hello tiny one. You are the future." Well. That's how I plan to wake up the Kid tomorrow. Oh yeah, and Jodi's friend made the "Edward R. Meow" puppet!

Just kidding about the divorce. More than likely we will be going to see V for Vendetta for his birthday. I think he'd rather stay home and play WOW, but too bad, you're stuck with me sucker. I'm kind of not looking forward to seeing "V" cause when we went to Comic Con last year, EVERYONE had that mask on, and it totally freaked me out. I'm worried about seeing it in my nightmares.

*That show kind of sucks, by the way.
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he'd laugh and he'd cry and he'd ruin my place

The baby laughs heartily when he's kissed under his chin.
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long in the tooth and short on wisdom

6:30 am, and I'm out the door. I didn't even know Starbucks was giving away free coffee today. Kill me.

Today was the last of my dental visits. *cheers all around* It was the final of three visits to the 'high tech dentist.' 7 hours in total. That's 4 hours longer than the labor of my second kid, by the way.

At the end of it all, he showed me the before and after, and...it was unbelieveable. Crumbelieveable, even. Turns out the 'butcher dentist' not only left an instrument in my tooth, but he put a post in there, not down the root canal, mind you, but just randomly drilled it into my tooth, at an angle. Thanks, dick. If he had pushed any harder it would have come out of the side of my tooth. It's a miracle I still have the tooth and that this new 'high tech dentist' was able to save it.

I am forever indebted to him, literally, seeing as how after paying him, I now have no money to eat anyway. I have also come to the realization that novicaine does a number on me. My heart starts pitter pattering, I get weak in the knees and feel faint. Those all sound like the similar symptoms of being in love, only with novicaine no one wants to kiss you when you are all drool-y.
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you make me sad and you make me glad

You know those people who say they never win anything? That's not me. I win a lot. Especially when it comes to guessing numbers. Strangely enough, I don't play the lottery. However, roulette - well, that's paid my bills quite a few times.

When SecretAgentJosephine had her baby, there was a 'guess the date' contest. I was one of the winners, due to the fact that I picked my own Kid's birthdate. Her prize was pretty awesome, a mug with one of her illos on it. So very cute. A secret agent baby!
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Yeah we tease him a lot cause we’ve got him on the spot

Some things I need to get off my chest:

1. Ice Cube is starring as Kotter in the Welcome Back, Kotter movie. I'm serious.

2. March = shamrock shakes. Got my annual one, regretted it as always. Maybe I have an aversion to green food. If things are green, they should just be green, right? And why they think making them thicker will make them taste better, I dunno.

3. Who was it who told me Kevin looks like Chicken Little?

4. I don't watch dating shows, but I hear the new season of the Bachelor is looking for sexy architects. Hm. Let me think back to arch school....that's a NO. Still, some of these comments "notoriously cheap, arrogant and generally terrible dates, if not altogether gay," why that's just mean. So at the end of the article they ask ladies, what the sexiest profession? I don't know if I agree with the answers, although I can't think of any myself.
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Beware the ides of March

As anyone who took AP English knows, tomorrow is the Ides of March. I never forget March 15th because I had to memorize a whole f*cking* scene from Caesar, to recite for a test, and I enlisted my little brother to help me with the memorization. Thus allowing my brother - whose mind is a steel trap - to still recite it word for word to me, to this day.

It also marks the last of my f*cking* dental visits. (*As well as allowing me to say the word f*cking, twice.) This is supposedly it, the day when everything is fixed and all is well, in my mouth. We shall see.

It also is the day when I decide what to do with my hair for this wedding. Should I just grow it out or cut it short again. I am in an in between stage in a bad, bad way. Thank god none of you can see me right now. And if you can, stop looking.
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If it's a mirror you want, just look into my eyes, or a whipping boy, someone to despise

mranderson: i liked brand new day
justJENN: Hello, YOU were the one I was talking about having the long standing argument with.
mranderson: rofl
mranderson: did you even buy the brand new day cd?
justJENN: Hell no I did not.
mranderson: so many good songs.
justJENN: Did you even read that post? FIRST TWO ALBUMS - the end.
mranderson: i have sting and U2 live combo set from some african concert, tis dope
justJENN: DUDE. U2 - same thing, past Joshua Tree, they can suck it.
mranderson: so as i was saying, Sting is awesome
mranderson: but a lot less awesome than Jack Bauer
justJENN: If Jack Bauer was in the Police, they wouldn't have broken up.
mranderson: If you left Jack Bauer alone in a room with a guitar, in 1 hour you would have the best Album ever created.

Someone asked me if I watch 24. Believe it or not, I don't. I just like Jack Bauer quotes.
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I dreamed all day, 'bout a rock and roll weekend

Sunday morning means driving to the Hollywood Farmer's Market. When the Kid is in the car, we HAVE to listen to the Wiggles. He's demanding like that. That's how he rolls. But when those tiny eyelids shut, I switch it to MY music on the sly. Still, you can't fool everyone...

Husband: "Ok. Kid's asleep, you can turn off the Wiggles now."
Me: "Uh...this is SOCIAL DISTORTION."
Husband: "Oh. Sounds like the Wiggles to me."

Can you tell the difference? Social D. - The Wiggles.
I don't think that was the sound Mike Ness was going for.
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So can you squeeze me into an empty page of your diary

I read a lot of blogs.
It's ridiculous.
Not everyday.
I do have a life.
Well.
Not really.
I've moved all the links here.
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Kiss me goodbye when I'm on my own, but you know that I'd rather be home

More music, and questions!

When Oprah speaks, the world listens, for better or worse. Today I watched her tout James Blunt and all his English charm. He told the backstory of "You're Beautiful." How he was on the subway and saw his ex-girlfriend, sitting with her new boyfriend. Their eyes locked, and their world became one for that brief second. Then he never saw her again. Oh so heartbreaking. If I was a girlie girl, I'd tear up a little. Um, maybe I did. Anyway, that chick must be embarrassed since the whole album is about her, and how desperately he loves/loved her.

There are some songs that you 'feel' in just the right way. "Question of Lust" by Depeche Mode. I can listen to it quietly, while I fall asleep. Or loudly while singing it at the top of my voice. So, since I got nothin', (as I said before) I'm passing the buck on to you. Hey, I can't do all the work around here. I ask you, what song makes your heart ache?
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Free, free, set them free

Today is my Grandpa's 89th birthday. He sent me a 'message' via O.G., that being: "Don't visit me. Don't come over. And definitely do not bring me cake." Fine. Screw you old man. Unless he was playing some sort of reverse psychology on me...hmmm. Oh well. His 'no cake-having ass' will never find out.

Instead I will tell you of the long standing debate I've had with a friend of mine over the fact that I feel that Sting, well...sucks now. How's that for an expertly analyzed description?

There are two albums of his which I feel are just beyond brilliant, that being Dream of the Blue Turtles and Nothing Like the Sun. Those were when Sting was truly fresh and had something to say. As opposed to everything afterwards which just screams 'dentist office muzak' to me.

Dream of the Blue Turtles was his first solo release and one of my favorite records. It spoke a lot about the breakup of the Police, while still being telling, pointed and of course self obsessed*. (*See: my love of Robbie Williams.) It was an excellent mix, a sort of jazzy pop, that was removed from the Police, but still stayed close to it. If that makes sense. Basically a really good first step as a solo release.

'Nothing' was his sophomore album, and those, well sometimes fall flat. However this one held it's own. "Englishman in New York" I could just listen to over and over. Even with the new arrangement on his 'best of cd.' Yes, I bought the 'best of cd' despite having that annoyingly overplayed 'Fields of Gold' song on there. Good lord, I can't hit 'next' on the iPod fast enough.

Why am I discussing my old skool Sting love? Well, cause I got nothin' else, people. Nothing else. Tune in next week for a cupcake recipe or something.
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Who died and made you f*cking king of the zombies?

Say, that was a depressing post! But rather than delete it, let me tell you what cures the blues, ZOMBIES.

I watched Shaun of the Dead again last night, and the weird thing was, last week I had a dream/nightmare about zombies.

My dreams feel real. I also dream in color. I was in a huge bright green field full of zombies. I was scared til I remembered that Kevin & Bean said zombies are so slow, anyone can outrun a zombie. A 5 year old could out run a zombie. Too true.
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Love and hate what a beautiful combination. Feel it sliver up and down my spine.

Seriously. It's been days now of complete crap. I mean really. Could I feel any worse? And no, it's not the kids. (entirely) It's just...blah.

Like a feeling of heaviness on you that you can't push off. The kind of day where you put on a smile for everyone else and when the door closes, you're so exhausted from feeling like crap, that you don't know whether to bite your lip to keep from crying or just collapse in a heap on the floor.

Since it will be cold this weekend I think I will snuggle under a blanket and watch AbFab. That's a mighty fine idea. Luckily someone sent me some peppermints which should add to the situation and make me feel better, instantly.

If that doesn't work, you can find me over here.
In the corner.
In a heap.
On the floor.
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I hope this gave you a little taste of what life is like at Dunder Mifflin. What it’s like to walk in Oscar’s shoes or try on Phyllis' pants.

Dear Pam,
Dump Roy.
Please go to Australia with Jim.
Love,
me

Another night of reruns. Sad.

Who should Pam end up with?
	Roy
	Jim
	Dwight
	Michael
	Kevin
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Carry on

I know what you're thinking. CHLOE? Really? Chloe?? Yes. Apparently cream puff sleeves and shrugs are the next big thing. *sigh* Does no one *heart* cute gay men the way I do?

I am having trouble finding people to go places with me. Maybe it's because no one has the same taste as me, maybe because it's harder to go out nowadays. My friend says it's because we are OLD now. Hello. Speak for yourself, sister. All I know is that Dntel is playing at the Walt Disney Concert Hall in an event celebrating the minimalist movement. The deal? It's from midnight to 6am.
Ok.
She's right.
I'm old.

But forget all that, someone makes industrial music...starring DWIGHT SCHRUTE.
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Edina: "Books give me itchy eyes, darling.”

My husband received this $10 Victoria's Secret giftcard in the mail. He has never even shopped there! More puzzling than why he received it is - why don't I get these?? I mean it's free money, dammit! I shop there all the time and what do I get from them? Jack. I'm stealing this thing and going on a $10 spending spree. Sadly that would probably only buy me 1/4 of a bra.

On a side note, there is an article in a magazine about kid's first birthday parties. Guess who's party they featured as "one of the best ways to celebrate your little one turning one?" That's right. Oh, if only you knew my real name.

**Update:
So I took the card and used it on one of these new wireless IPEX bras. The commercials are right. This thing is the schiznit.
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Peter Porker and the Amazing SpiderHam

**So when you told me tonight that 24 was AWESOME, you meant it was because Kim's boyfriend is the mother f*cking SOUL MAN! Say, that is awesome!**


My friend is having a baby. A boy. I've known this guy for 24 years (yikes) and he's been waiting for this day. This day when he finally has a son that he can name after Spiderman. No, it's not Peter, think again. What irony if that kid grows up to hate comic books? Then he's stuck with that name for life.

As far as babies are concerned, sure you don't think they have feelings, since they can't understand you, but they just might. Oh, they just might.

My mother in law has become concerned about the Baby's weight. God forbid he becomes "obese" as she says. Hello, he's 3 months old. Let's just wait to see shall we? Until then I suppose she can just point her jabs my way...

MIL: "The Kid is so skinny, and the baby...is SO FAT."
*silence*
MIL: "Wow, the Baby really looks like your side of the family!"

Nice.
Now I'm not skinny, but I'm not fat. And I do know when I'm insulted.
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Laissez les bons temps rouler

It was my mom's birthday last week. Seeing as how our family likes Southern food I made a tricked out version of traditional red beans and rice, with a few extras - kielbasa, tomatoes, and lots and lots of spices.

I also made some yummy lemon cupcakes. I am still on the hunt for a cupcake recipe that is airy, not heavy. No luck so far. Cake mix is the right consistency, but I just CAN'T stand that cake mix-y taste. I taste it, I'm telling you. It bugs me. I used a color paste for the flowers which made them nice and bright. Although my piping skills leave something to be desired.

Recipe HERE.

L.A. woman

Thanks to Maria, I've been meme'd. She is nice, so I'm not mad about it. I’ve done this before, but now there’s a twist. Four things RELATED TO L.A. Now that I can go for....four? I mean for.

Four L.A. Things:
Four Jobs I’ve Had In My Life in LA:
1. I WAS a piece of art in a Barbara Kruger exhibition at MOCA.
2. I dressed up as McGruff the Crime Dog
3. Was an extra in 'Mr. Baseball'.
4. I spent all day drawing pictures of urinals.

Four Movies About LA I Could Watch Over And Over:
(for the last two I cheated and used THIS.)
1. L.A. Story
2. Father of the Bride
3. Clueless
4. Fast Times at Ridgemont High

Four Places I’ve Lived All Over L.A. (With Food Memories From Each):
-see 'fave foods', I don't move around much.

Four LA-Themed Shows I Love(d) To Watch:
It’s like, you know
Arrested Development (Not technically L.A. but who cares)

Four Places I Would Vacation At In LA:
Disneyland

Four LA-Based Websites I Visit Daily:
Rubber Sol
Say it Don’t Spray It
Be the Boy
Jodi101

Four Of My Favorite Foods Found In LA:
2 tacos, no cheese+root beer – Tito’s Tacos
Chicken and waffles – Roscoe's
Brownies – The Farm of Beverly Hills
chilaquiles – Hollywood Farmer's Market

Four Places In LA I Would Rather Be Right Now:
Titos
Spending hours in the aisles of Amoeba
Surfas
Disneyland

Tagged:
Those 4 blogs I visit daily.
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Winter kills

The Oscars are tomorrow and that sucks. Only because it means mad traffic in Hollywood, so I won't get to sit on a dirty curb and eat chilaquiles, as is my Sunday ritual.

Also this weather is killing me. Last week it was 85 degrees. I took that to mean that summer is here, and put away all my winter wear. ('Winter wear' meaning anything with sleeves.) Now it's f*ing freezing and raining, with flash flood warnings. Screw it. I'm too lazy to dig out appropriate attire. If you see me on the street in shorts and sandals - don't judge. Just wave and keep walking.
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bye bye poop

Ok. That's just nasty.
Whoever's googling horchata, (that sounds nasty too) just stop.
We don't want to know your troubles.

*today's post is dedicated to oneNjen.
Who is tired of talking about *ass* apparently.
.

What is the difference between salesmen and saleswomen?

The Office is too real because how many times had something on my desk been hit by a football/rubberband/wadofpaper where I stood up screamed 'cut that shit out!' It always happens when you're on a deadline and those who are throwing things, are not. Course I also stood up and screamed 'cut that shit out' when some idiot kept playing U2 Zooropa over and over, loudly. But that's just because anything released by them after 1988 is a piece of crap. *my opinion*

Poor Pam. You just saw that Jim vacation date coming, didn't you?
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What happened to Andre?

August 18, August 18!
A week before my birthday, AND...the release of Clerks II. Hooray!

As for Project Runway, well. I dunno. I was less than thrilled with Daniel V's collection, except for that cashmere white car coat, holy crap that was beyond gorgeous to me. I'd wear it in 80 degree heat.

At this point, I actually think Santino could win it all. And they totally humanized him for this show, a little late, but whatever. Don't get me started on Chloe's designs, I can only imagine she used cream puffs as her inspiration.

In other news, I ate this today.
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I can feel, the discomfort in your seat. And in your head it’s worse.

My new Belle & Sebastian cd, as well as the new Elvis Costello 'jazz' album, arrived today and all is right in the world.

What is not right in the world is my fat ass. Ok, it's not that fat considering I have now lost 13 pounds on the 'eat ice cream, don't exercise' diet. But still. I went bridesmaid dress shopping today and what the FEH is up with the fact that wedding attire is like 2 sizes bigger than what you normally wear? It's wrong to make people feel fatter than they are on a day when everyone's looking at them. More conversations about dresses:

O.G.: "...and I remember his mom cause she used to belong to that group. You know, the 'elite' one. They all wore white dresses."
Jenn: "The KKK?"
*ignoring me*
O.G.: "They used to go to dinners..."

I like to screw with her. It amuses me. I am evil.
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